Call of Duty Elite's app has, belatedly, appeared in the iOS App store - with Android versions set to follow next week. We've downloaded it, fiddled with it and taken screenshots that detail the woeful performance we put in during a Headquarters Pro match late on Sunday night.
If your correspondent had realised he'd be sharing his lack of ability with the world later in the week then, to be honest, he'd have gone to bed earlier.
The app covers the free areas of Elite rather than the paid-for stuff, and is pretty slick to boot. Indeed, it steers well clear of primary (and generally poorly implemented) Elite features like groups, clans, gameplay tips and terrible shouty US TV shows where the Army takes on the Navy, Policemen take on Firemen and various other match-ups that sound a bit like gay porn.
So let's run through the basics...
Your whole MW3 career appears in the palm of your hand - complete with prestige calculator, (potentially appalling) kill/death ratio, win percentage and the run-down of your favoured game modes. It's top level stuff, but if you need to remind yourself how amazing you are at shooting people while on the bus to work - then the proof is now only a few finger-taps away.
This department of the app deals with your last ten matches - which you can view through the lens of various statistics like k/d ratio, headshots, XP, assists and other murderous activity. As shown here, this could well make for some quite depressing graph-age, but will at least allow GCSE Maths teachers to bring some meaning into the class-room instead of their usual bullshit bar charts about fruit sales. Or whatever they do now. The run-down of your most recent game, including your nemesis and most picked-on victim, can also be accessed here.
MW3 Custom Classes
The most interesting part of the Elite app, this lets you fiddle with your load-outs while you're out and about - then upload them so they're ready to pepper the pavements of Paris with metal the second you get home. In truth, it's useful simply because when you're sitting in front of the TV the time spent wrangling with what you 'rock with' (in American parlance) can feel like time wasted. Some 'Improve' features would've been nice here though, so we could learn a bit more about each weapon and strike package though...
The full run-down of your progress through the varied in-game challenges and basic in-game XP harvests - again, something that's fascinating to leaf through yet not quite as much fun as filling men with pain when you're online with MW3. How many more headshots before a bonus? Have you been featured in the final killcam with a dainty knife throw? Have you killed yourself by falling an embarrassing distance?
A good, if lightweight, app then - with various departments that can be fleshed out as iterations of Call of Duty come and go. The Elite experience has historically been one of broken servers, delays and occasional disappointment - so the slickness of the mobile app is something to celebrate. Or at least add to cacophony of apps fighting for your attention deep within your Apple or Android companion.
I'm going now. Please don't be mean about my Call of Duty skills in the comment thread.
A slick, handy tool for Call of Duty enthusiasts that lets you keep track of stats on the go.